On September 21, 2025, the International Mediation Institute (IMI) marked International Peace Day 2025 with a profound and timely conversation with renowned conflict resolution experts Ken Cloke and Andrea O’Neill. The event, “From Micro-Dialogues to Global Peace: Expanding Mediation’s Reach”, which was moderated by IMI Executive Director Ivana Ninčić Österle and IMI Intern Abigél Farkas, provided participants with a space to discuss the power of narrative in shifting divisive monologues to genuine dialogues, leading to a more peaceful world.
The Power of Questions
Ken Cloke emphasized how much dialogues are needed in today’s world, and explained how mediation and dialogue can serve to create unity. This process requires embracing different views, diversity, and the unique perspective each person can bring to a discussion. Ken Cloke argued that, without this approach, our ability to solve complex problems is significantly diminished. When engaging in a discussion, a question we can ask is: “How much room is there in the conversation for you to be you?”
In order to truly open up a conversation, we must master the art of asking “dangerous questions”. In a genuine dialogue, questions and answers continue until they merge into a shared pursuit, making the speakers partners in search. This process shifts the goal from winning a debate toward creating a new relationship built on compassion and collaboration.
Through questions like “What life experiences have you had, that led you to feel so passionately about this issue?”, real dialogue can begin, allowing us to move beyond ideology to uncover shared humanity.
There is great value in having unanswered questions. In order to highlight this, Ken Cloke shared a powerful quote:
“Questions unite people, answers divide them.”
Mediation Skills Applied in Everyday Life
Andrea O’Neill spotlighted that mediation skills can and should be translated into the “outside world”, where mediators can utilize their skills outside of formal processes to foster genuine human connection and create a space for dialogue, where people can see their shared lived experiences. Dialogue is about shifting people from a rigid “tunnel vision” to a “peripheral vision”, where they can connect with shared human experiences such as family, loss, and pain. According to Andrea O’Neill, peacebuilding starts with micro-dialogues: “We start in our own homes, we start in our own relationships, we start in our own communities.”
Following this, Andrea O’Neill, drawing on the difficult history of the Good Friday Agreement in Ireland, shared an important reminder that change can come from the bottom up, driven by communities. Peace, she noted, is not a final destination but a fragile and continuous journey.
Tools to Transform Conversations
Ken Cloke underscored that every human has the capacity for empathy and listening. One of the most effective tools we possess is that we can simply ask: “Tell me more.” This phrase will make the other person feel more “at home” and satisfy the desire for respectful communication.
Ken Cloke shared 3 key foundational questions for the participants to take away and use to catalyze any dialogue:
- “What question would you most like me to ask you?”
- “What are we not talking about now that we need to talk about in order for our conversation to be useful to the both of us?”
- “What is one thing I could do right now to make this conversation work better for you?”
The power of these ideas was echoed in the experiences shared by participants. This conversation serves as a call for us to have the courage to ask better questions, to listen more deeply, and to start engaging in micro-dialogues within our own communities to continue the journey of peace.
Ready to make a difference? Explore the links below to find out how your actions can help create a more peaceful future.
- United Nations, Actions for a Peaceful World
- United Nations, 2025 Theme: Act Now for a Peaceful World
- What is the International Day of Peace?
To delve deeper into the themes of dialogue and peace, explore these resources:
- Research on Trauma in communities following the ‘Troubles’ in Ireland
- 50 Questions You Can Ask Friends and Relatives in Political Arguments KEN CLOKE
- Ken Cloke How to Design Organize and Facilitate Dialogues over Difficult Divisive and Dangerous Issues
- 50 Possible Questions to Open Israeli-Palestinian Dialogues KEN CLOKE
Greetings IMI Mediators and Secretariat.
I feel honored to be part of the team and discussions,
This is my comments.
Confronting questions and discussions are both vital and positive in a relationship because they build trust, strengthen emotional connections and help parties connect with their needs and expectations.
They allow parties navigate conflicts, align values and work together on shared future ,more secure and enduring bond.
Mediator